


save your strength (and stay alive) : part four

by redhairedmuses



Series: save your strength (and stay alive) [4]
Category: 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Carlos-centric, Hospitalization, M/M, Major Character Injury, Michelle is a good friend, TK-Centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-17
Updated: 2020-02-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:26:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22776370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redhairedmuses/pseuds/redhairedmuses
Summary: final part in the series "save your strength (and stay alive)".stemmed from an idea i had on my tumblr. basically, Carlos is shot while on a call. TK worries for him. There's plenty of angst and feelings. So many, many feelings.please enjoy!
Relationships: Carlos Reyes (9-1-1 Lone Star)/TK Strand
Series: save your strength (and stay alive) [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1628944
Comments: 18
Kudos: 307





	save your strength (and stay alive) : part four

**Author's Note:**

> the final part in the series "save your strength (and stay alive)". i am so proud of this series and so grateful for all the positive comments, kudos, etc. i have received towards this. thank you all so much!
> 
> i look forward to writing more of these two. 
> 
> now, enjoy the final part!
> 
> \- natalie
> 
> note: i usually write in past-tense, but i wanted to give present-tense a try. so, any mistake i make is mine, and mine alone.

* * *

**4 DAYS LATER**

The first thing Carlos faintly remembers after being shot is the feeling of something warm holding his hand. Something - _no, no - someone,_ he says to himself - is rubbing their thumb along his wrist. Someone squeezes his hand. There is a whisper in his ear and pressure on his forehead - _a kiss?_ he wonders. Another voice appears. The first voice whispers something to him again, and then that voice (that beautiful, warm voice) is gone, and he is in silence once more. 

Time passes slowly for Carlos.

His eyelids flicker, but he does not stir. 

When he finally comes to, Carlos wakes to find there's a tube down his throat, and he instantly panics. His eyes widen, and he starts to choke. His heart rate spikes and alarms start to go off around him. He clenches his fist as big, blurry blobs of maroon and white flood into the room. Nurses and one doctor run to his side, and they work to remove the tube from his throat. To his left, a nurse tries talking to him, but Carlos is still in fight mode.

"Officer Reyes, you need to lie still for us, okay?" she says to him. Her voice is comforting, which helps him but not much. "We need to remove the tube. Please stay still. It'll be over before you know it."

Carlos' wide eyes flick over to the doctor and the other nurse beside him. He needs to trust them. He nods, closes his eyes, and lets the doctor remove the tube from his throat. It burns for a couple of seconds. Carlos feels like he's going to throw up and nearly chokes on the tube as it is finally removed from his throat.

"Shit," he manages to gasp out.

His voice is scratchy and sounds like he just smoked two packs of cigarettes back to back. He shudders. He coughs several times and nearly vomits. 

"Officer Reyes?" the doctor asks him. "Do you remember what happened to you?" 

Carlos nods. 

"Shot," he grits out. 

"Good, good," the doctor says, patting him on the shoulder. The doctor turns to one of the nurses and murmurs something vague about his vitals; he doesn't really pay much attention to them. The nurse taps a few notes onto her tablet, and the doctor quietly signs the tablet.

"I have to say, you gave us quite a scare, Officer Reyes," the doctor says. He offers Carlos a small smile. "I'll notify Miss Blake that you're awake. Don't try to talk too much, okay? You've been through hell the last couple of days, and you need to rest. I'll have one of the nurses come back in about an hour, alright?"

Carlos nods again and flinches as he tries to move. His body feels heavy and like it's been hit by a semi going full speed. Luckily, he has great pain meds coursing through his veins. 

The doctor leaves the room, and one of the nurses follows behind. The other nurse finishes checking his vital signs, adjusts his IV, and then leaves the room again with a small smile. Then, Carlos is alone once more. He looks down at the hospital gown and almost wonders what damage is there. He leans back into the hospital bed and looks up at the ceiling. 

He closes his eyes and starts to drift. 

At first, the memories come in flashes. 

He's standing in the street with his gun drawn.

It's storming. Rain is soaking through his uniform and clinging to his skin. Lightning flashes and thunder roars around him. 

Across from him, the house is on fire. Andre is on the lawn, waving a gun around. Trina is still inside. The kids are safe and at a friend's house, he recalls. 

He shouts something, and then Andre is gone. 

He takes after him. Someone shouts his name, and there are sirens behind him: fire truck sirens - 

_TK._

His mind continues to wander. 

He remembers running. His boots splashing on the pavement. Andre is a few steps ahead of him, but not for long. He's so close. He can tackle the guy and - and then he rounds a corner. 

There's a pistol between his eyes. 

Time seems to standstill. He lets out a shaky breath. TK's face crosses his mind, then there are three flashes. 

Gunshots. 

And his whole body feels like it's on fire. He lets out a scream, and his world goes black.

Then, he hears a voice in the darkness. 

_TK's voice._

_"Carlos? Carlos, please, I'm here, I'm here, okay? Just hold on, please? Hold on -_

_"I love you! And I still need you, okay? I need you here with me. I want there to be an us..."_

_"I love you, Carlos. I love you, and I need you to wake up, okay? Please?"_

_wake up. wake up. wake up. WAKE. UP._

With a startled cry, Carlos shoots upright in bed. He opens his eyes and looks down to see his hands balled into fists, and his heart rate is starting to rise. His starts to hyperventilate, his lungs burning with each breath he takes. It sets off an alarm, and one of the nurses runs into his room — the same one who had been there earlier and calmed him down when they removed the tube. 

"Officer Reyes, is everything alright?" she asks him. 

Carlos shakes his head and pinches the bridge of his nose. He thumps his head against the hospital bed, feeling a tad stupid. He lets out a shaky breath.

"Shooting, I remember the shooting," he says hoarsely. 

"You've just been through a trauma, Officer Reyes," the nurse sighs. She touches his hand, offering him a smile. "You need to let your mind rest, and your body heal."

"I can't just sit here while Andre's still out there," Carlos snaps. "I need to - " he lets out a groan.

"I understand that, but you've been through significant trauma, and your body could go into shock if you continue to force yourself to remember every little detail," the nurse replies. She sighs and removes her hand from his. "Let your body rest and heal. You need to relax. You are no good to the department if you fight me on this."

Carlos turns his head away from the nurse. 

"I feel useless, just sitting here," Carlos confesses. He gestures to his bed, and the wires and IVs hooked up around him. "I should be out there, doing my job." 

"You were shot in the line of duty, Officer Reyes," the nurse says, her voice harsh. She sighs, and then her voice shakes. "Some aren't as lucky as you."

Carlos flinches. 

"I'm sorry," he whispers. 

"It's alright," the nurse sighs. She instinctively reaches up and retrieves a Saint Michael's pendent from under her scrubs. She rubs her thumb over the pendent. "My brother knew the risks when he joined the department. He was a great cop, and I was proud to call him my big brother."

"What was his name?" Carlos asks. 

"Deigo Martinez," the nurse answers. 

Carlos recognizes the name. Martinez was with the K9 unit. They'd had crossed paths a couple of times, but he wasn't close to the man. He remembers the day Martinez was killed too. A drug raid went wrong, and Martinez was shot in the neck by a stray bullet. His K9, Beck, was injured during the attack and managed to crawl over to Martinez and lay beside him as he bled out. They both died at the scene.

Carlos feels like an ass now. A giant ass who should've kept his mouth shut.

"I'm sorry about your brother," he says quietly. 

"Thank you," the nurse smiles. "Diego loved being a cop more than anything on this earth. He and Beck were more than just partners; they were best friends."

Carlos closes his eyes again and bites his lip. His mind flickers back to the shooting. He needs to know what happened after he was shot. Did Trina make it out okay? And did they find the kids? What about Andre? Was he still on the loose? And TK - did he - was he - 

"Carlos?" 

Carlos whirls his head around, and there's Michelle standing in the doorway with a gym bag slung over her shoulder. He feels a weight leave his shoulders. She's out of uniform, dressed in all black again, and her face is a mixture of relief and _sadness?_

"I came as soon as I could," she says, walking up to his bedside. She grabs his hand and squeezes it. 

Carlos returns the affection, squeezing Michelle's hand tightly. 

"If you need me, my name is Lydia," the nurse - _Lydia -_ says. She quietly takes her leave and closes the door behind her. 

Michelle drops the gym bag on the floor and wraps her arms around him and hugs him, which he gladly accepts. Carlos clings to her, clutching at the back of her shirt. He can catch a whiff of disinfectant, perfume, and smoke still on her shirt. 

"How are you feeling?" she asks him once they've ended their hug.

"Like shit," Carlos replies. 

"I can imagine," Michelle chuckles. She brushes back some of his curls, and he quickly shoos her hands away. "You've been through a lot."

Carlos looks to Michelle and then glances down at the gym bag lying on the floor. He jerks his head towards it and asks, "What's in the bag?" Michelle's lips quirk into a grin. She unzips the bag and pulls out a Zip-Loc bag of chips and a small container of what appears to be pico de gallo. Carlos feels his mouth water, and his stomach lets out a growl. 

"Chips and salsa from our favorite taco stand. Lupé was devastated when she found out what happened. She told me that she plans to give you free tacos for the rest of your life," Michelle says, placing the items in front of him. She retrieves a very well-worn copy of Tolkien's _The Lord of the Rings_ and hands it to him. "Some light reading material. And - " the last item she pulls out what appears to be a new phone. "A gift."

"What happened to my old phone?" Carlos asks, quirking a brow.

"Shattered, obliterated, destroyed," she answers in a few words. Michelle starts digging into the chips and salsa. He envies her as she dips her chip into the salsa and takes a bite. After all the damage his body had sustained, he knows he'll be on a liquid diet for at least a week. He frowns at the thought.

She breaks off another chip and dips into the salsa. "You fell on it after you were shot," she says over a mouthful of the food. "Your friends at the department tried putting it back together, but the damage was too much. I'm sorry, sweetie."

"Probably time for a new one anyway," Carlos murmurs, fiddling with the new phone in his hand. 

Carlos mourns the loss of his old phone and all the photos, messages, videos. He looks down at the new phone in his hand and sighs. He turns it on, and his eyes widen when he sees that his screensaver is a photo of him and TK. 

_Sweet, beautiful, loving TK._

Carlos feels his heart skip a beat. 

"How did you - "

"TK sent me the photo after I bought the phone," Michelle answers for him. She winks and leans back in her chair. "I figured it might make you feel a little better after everything that's happened." 

Carlos runs his thumb over the picture, a smile forming on his lips. He nods, thanks Michelle, and then places the phone on the table beside him. He turns back to Michelle, who has now eaten over half of the chips and salsa. He frowns at her, and she grins sheepishly at him.

"You plan on saving anything for me?" he asks. 

"I promise to have Lupé make a special batch for you when you can actually eat solid foods," Michelle says with a laugh. She crosses her fingers over her heart. 

Carlos shakes his head.

"I'm holding you to that promise," he says.

For the next couple of hours, Carlos and Michelle talk about everything that's happened since the shooting. He finds out that Andre was captured just 2 days after the fire. He was found at a bus station in Dallas trying to sneak on a bus to Tulsa. He was apprehended, taken back to Austin, and is now sitting in the local jail awaiting trial for a slew of charges. 

Trina and the kids are staying with relatives in Houston, hoping to start a new life for themselves. Michelle comments that the kids miss him and want to come back to Austin and visit him. Carlos asks about his family, and Michelle explains that she's already called them, and they have plans to fly out from L.A. tomorrow. He thanks her for all she's done for him, and Michelle brushes it off. She expresses that she misses him being on the scene of some of her calls, but 126 has been a great help. She takes another scoop of salsa into her mouth and then says that TK has been coming to visit him practically after all his shifts -

"What?" 

Carlos feels his heart stutter at the mention of TK. He nearly chokes on his water and clears his throat. Michelle polishes off the salsa and chips, quirking a brow. 

"The nurses didn't tell you?" Michelle asks. 

"Tell me what?" Carlos says. 

Michelle lets out a sigh, and Carlos senses that she's hiding something from him. She quietly stows the now empty bag of chips and salsa in the gym bag and grabs Carlos' hand. She opens her mouth to speak, but a knock interrupts her. She pats Carlos on the hand, stands up, and goes to the door. Carlos tries to peer from behind Michelle, and he feels his whole world stop as TK comes into view. 

"TK," he whispers. 

TK is out of uniform, dressed in tight-fitting jeans, a button-up, and sneakers. His hair is a bit disheveled and wet. _he just got out of the shower,_ Carlos thinks to himself. Michelle steps aside and allows TK to enter the room. 

"Hi, uhm, I was just coming by - look, I can come back later," TK says, gesturing to the door. 

Michelle waves him off and shakes her head.

"It's okay. I have something I have to do first," she says. "Can you keep an eye on Carlos for me? Thank you, you are the best, TK Strand. I'll be back in a bit." She claps a hand on TK's shoulder and then disappears, closing the door behind her. 

The silence is awkward and Carlos feels the tension building.

"TK, I'm - "

"Carlos, I - "

They try again. TK clears his throat and gestures to Carlos. 

"You go first - "

"No, you."

Carlos sighs and then holds out his hand. He watches as TK stares at it, but he makes no attempt to reach for it. He notices the way TK's fingers twitch, and he quickly forms his hand into a fist. Sensing the tension, Carlos slowly draws his hand back, and it lays limp in his lap. 

"You wanna sit?" he asks after a beat of heavy silence. 

"Sure," TK says. 

TK sits down in the chair beside him and the two are in silence once again. Carlos watches as TK wrings his hands together, rubbing them on the top of his jeans and chewing at his bottom lip. He wants to reach out and calm TK, but he's afraid too. He's not sure if comforting TK is the appropriate thing to do. 

"How are you feeling?" TK asks. 

Carlos shrugs. 

"A bit sore, but that's to be expected," he answers. 

"I'm glad you're okay," TK says. "You - uhm, you gave everyone a scare."

TK looks exhausted like he's pulled a 24-hour shift. Carlos continues to analyze TK's appearance, sees the bags under his eyes. His skin is paler than usual. TK runs a hand over his face and then rakes it through his hair. Carlos wants nothing more than to reach out and touch TK's cheek. 

To hold him. 

To kiss him and tell him how much he's missed him. How much he cares about him. How much he loves him. 

_i heard you._ a part of him screams. _i heard you._

_tell him you heard him._

_tell him. tell him._

"Carlos - " TK starts.

"I heard you," Carlos interrupts. 

TK looks stunned. He blinks a few times and tilts his head. 

"What?" TK whispers. 

"I heard you," Carlos repeats. He swallows. _shit, why is this so much easier in movies,_ he wonders. "When I was on the stretcher? I heard you. I heard you say my name and I felt your hand."

"You did?" TK's voice is just barely above a whisper.

Carlos nods.

"Yeah, I did."

Then, TK starts to crack. There are tears in his eyes, and it breaks Carlos' heart. It's as if a visible weight has been lifted from TK's shoulders. 

" _Shit,"_ he whispers. "I heard your voice over the radio and _fucking Christ, Carlos._ For a second, I thought the worst. Then I saw you on the stretcher, and there was so much blood, and I just knew - " TK chokes on a sob, and his head drops. He shakes his head, sniffling. And Carlos swears that his heart is breaking in two. 

"I thought you were dead," TK continues. "You almost _died_ Carlos, and I was so scared. I thought I was going to lose you. I couldn't lose you. I needed to tell you that I - "

"Hey, hey, I know, I know," Carlos cuts in, shushing TK. He feels the tears in his own eyes. He wipes them away, but it doesn't stop them from falling. "I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I love you, okay? I love you."

The look on TK's face is both a mixture of relief and joy. And it melts Carlos' heart. 

With a laugh, Carlos reaches out and grabs TK's hand. TK quickly intertwines their fingers together and scoots closer to him. Carlos leans forward, grabbing the back of TK's neck and pressing their foreheads together. He can hear TK's breath in his ear, and he swears it's the most beautiful sound he's ever heard. Carlos almost wants to sob and cry. He closes his eyes, and they stay like that, just foreheads touching and fingers interlocked together. 

"I love you, Tyler," Carlos sighs. 

TK lets out something that resembles a mixture of a sob and laugh. 

Nodding, he says, "I love you too."

_i love you too._

_i love you too._

_i love you too._

Grinning, Carlos pulls away and then tugs TK in for a kiss. The second their lips touch, Carlos feels like everything is where it's supposed to be. He tastes salt-water on his lips, but he doesn't really care. He cards his fingers through TK's hair, which earns him an appreciative moan. He grins into the kiss and can't help but groan when TK breaks their kiss. 

"I love you," TK says again. 

"I love you too, now come here," Carlos says. 

He scoots over on the bed and gestures for TK to climb in next to him. TK appears hesitant at first, but eventually, with some coaxing and gentle pecks on his nose, he concedes and lies down beside him. Carlos wraps an arm around TK and rests his chin on top of his head, inhaling the scent of shampoo and cologne. TK is careful not to jostle any of the wires and IVs and finally settles in next to him. He curls one arm up to his chest and then stretches the other across his middle. 

"Promise me you'll be here when I wake up," TK whispers over a yawn. 

Carlos sighs and presses a kiss to TK's hair. 

"I promise," he says.

Carlos lets out another yawn. TK shifts beneath him. He tightens his hold around TK's middle and murmurs against his hair, "I promise."

_-fin-_

**Author's Note:**

> hmu on tumblr @red-hairedwriter7 if you want to cry with me about how TK and Carlos are beautiful and too pure for this world.


End file.
